will you come for us?

Gram & Kate Aug. 2008/as a young lady in 1938

Dear Grandma,

As we gathered around your bedside on Friday night I felt the most calm yet joyful reverence I ever remember feeling.  There must have been a glorious reunion in the room that was beyond our sight.  It was a privilege to be there.  Grandma, will you come for us when it is our turn to go?  

Did you hear Danny that night when he asked you to watch over us and our little girls?  They love you.  Sophie has mentioned you in every prayer since you left.  Ellie found the dress you were making for her doll.  She wants to finish it for you.  I have been going through the pictures I have of your life, and I found a series with you and Kate playing in your guest bedroom...I am going to frame it for her room.  

After you left that night we were all still there- Papa, Michel, Jimmy, Paul, Amanda, Randy, Sharon, Jason, Danny and I- already your home seemed empty.  All of your earthly possessions were there in front of us, yet we could feel that your presence was missing.  All of a sudden the things of this world seem a lot less important and we are reminded that our love and memories are our real treasures.

Thank you Grandma for all that you have taught us.

We hold you in our hearts always.

01.19.22-12.23.11

grandparent party

We are so blessed to live so close to so many of our relatives.  My girls have all of their grandparents within 45 miles...and even a great-grandmother (one great-grandma lives in a different state).  We see them often.  Usually it is in large groups with lots of cousins, aunts and uncles around.  The kids tend to run off and play and don't sit and visit as much as they do in small groups.  So we invited all of our local grandparents to a Christmas dinner party at our house.

We served:

roast beef

mashed potatoes

homemade rolls 

(the first time I can ever remember making them!)

a green salad

(with pomegranate, pistachios, grapefruit, and shredded carrots and a lemon dressing)

carrot cake for dessert

It was a busy afternoon...but worth every minute to have them with us at our table.  It felt good to serve them just a little bit.  They have done and continue to do so much for us.  After dinner we performed the Christmas songs we have been learning and asked them to sing a long with us.

Sophie-  Jolly Old St. Nicholas

Kate-   Jingle Bells

Ellie-  Oh Come All Ye Faithful

me...with Kate accompanying-  Sleep Well Little Children

group-  Away In A Manger

After the music we gave them each a gift.  The grandfather's received the Lower Lights Christmas CD.  The grandmother's received books that reminded us of them.  Great-grandma received a dvd- My Fair Lady (she is a fair lady).  My sweet friend also made Christmas holly pins for each of the grandmothers.

It was such a sweet evening for us.  We asked each of them as we visited what their favorite Christmas memory was--

Nana Miller-  She said that as a young girl, she worried herself sick every Christmas about whether she would not receive what she hoped for Christmas morning.  One year in particular...she felt ill from worry on Christmas Eve.  She woke up that next morning with all that she hoped for...and a special doll with a beautiful coral dress handmade my her mother.

Papa Miller-  "besides turkey & stuffing?"

Great-grandma-  She remembered last Christmas.  She had beautiful quilts made for each of us...grandchildren and great grandchildren.  She loved seeing them in her living room rolling up and cozy each in their own quilt.

Grandma Sally-  She remembered receiving a beautiful doll from her sister, who was quite a bit older than her, with beautiful outfits for the doll.  She also remembered an ice skating outfit.  It had a beautiful full skirt with pom-poms along the bottom.  She remembers ice skating with cousins on the lake that Christmas.

Grandpa Davis- He remembered the year that he and his brother received skis.  He was so surprised.  He remembers finding a hill and skiing that day.  He loved skiing and eventually worked on ski patrol at what is now Sundance.

After the party was over I asked the girls what their favorite part of the day was.
Ellie- playing our songs and watching them open their presents
Kate- Carrot cake
(her first time trying it!)
Sophie-receiving Christmas treat bags filled with tiny toys and stickers from Grandma Sally

We are so grateful for these special people in our lives.  We hope they will come every year to celebrate this beautiful holiday with us.  My plan was to take their pictures with the girls in front of the Christmas tree.  When the house was quiet and our guests had returned to their houses...and I looked at the lights of the tree I realized that I didn't take one picture.  I was enjoying the evening so much, I completely forgot.  I will do better next year...and leave my camera out...and ask Danny...actually the girls (they always remember) to remind me!

at her table

It has been a long week for all of us but especially Danny...and it was only Wednesday!  As I thought about what to feed everyone I knew a sure-fire pick me up for my people.  I gathered a few essentials: sourdough bread from the freezer, golden potatoes, an onion and I knew we would enjoy a nice meal together.  Danny's grandma (Grandma in Las Vegas) ran a busy catering business until very recently.  She is an excellent cook.  One of our favorite meals is her potato soup.  It is sure to make Danny a happy man!

1 cube of butter

3/4 to 1 c. of flour

7 c. water

7 chicken boullion cubes

7 potatoes

diced onion

shredded carrots

half and half (I use cream 9 times out of 10)

melt butter...stir in flour...add water slowly...add b.cubes, potatoes, onion, carrots.  When potatoes are soft add half and half.  Serve hot with sourdough bread and butter :)

Well, it worked.  Danny was in heaven.  The girls ate every bite and our week seemed to slowdown---even if it was just for that one meal.  Grandma has been sick for the past few months with colon cancer.  Sophie talked to her last Sunday.  She has prayed for "Grandma in Las Vegas" every single night.  Grandma thanked her Sunday.  It was sweet.  We love you Grandma! 

clam chowder

I knew it was serious when he bought my clam chowder.  Danny and I had been hanging out for a few months.  He and his roommate Stu were often at our apartment...or my roommates and I at theirs.  Stu and Heidi (one my roommates) were dating.  Danny and I enjoyed each other's company...and I was entertained by his flirting...but we were just friends.  Spring break was approaching and we decided to go on a road trip...my hometown (Petaluma, CA).  Danny, Stu, Heidi and I loaded in Danny's car and we made our way to California.

On our first day in Petaluma we decided to make the short drive to the city...San Fransisco.  We walked...visited Alcatraz and headed to Pier 39 around lunch time.  We chose Boudin Bakery for clam chowder in a bread bowl.  To my surprise, Danny bought my lunch.  Danny takes going out to eat and spending $ seriously.  So seriously that buying my lunch was like a flashing neon sign...DANNY LIKES ME.  I wasn't sure what to do or think.

After lunch we found the car and began driving around.  Danny decided to pull over at a park just after we visited Lombard street.  Stu and Heidi jumped right out...and I tried to stay as close (like glue!) to Heidi as I could.  :)  A romantic walk in the park...I wasn't ready.  I was scared.  Did I like him????  Did I want to marry him...after all---he did by my lunch ;) 

Later that night Danny and I were talking on the couch in my parent's living room.  "You don't want to talk about this..." he observed.  I was awkward and Danny was relaxed.  "Do you like me?" he asked.  I did like him.  He made me laugh.  He treated everyone he knew with kindness.  He was always happy.  He was (and still is) handsome.  He was ambitious, strong, smart...What wasn't to like?  So I told him my rule.  It was a rule to protect my heart... "I am not kissing anyone who is kissing anyone else."

Danny understood...but he wasn't sure how committed he was.  He had just taken a young lady out the week before, after all.  He was planning on taking her out again.  :) So we said "goodnight" with out a kiss.

The next morning the four of us headed out with my family to the ocean and then to church.  By the end of our road trip back to school---he had forgotten all about "what's her name" and it was official.  We were together~  and he has been buying me lunch ever since...

The fall weather inspires soup in our kitchen.  I combined a few different recipes and created my own version of clam chowder...

Clam Chowder
1 cube of butter
3/4 c. flour

Make a rue and add...
16 oz. of clam juice
8 c. of water
4 chicken or vegetable boullion cubes
1 large onion finely chopped
7-8 med. to lg. red potatoes diced
4-6 individual celery stalks chopped
garlic salt (a few heavy dashes)  real garlic with sea salt would be even better
paprika (a few heavy dashes)


Let this cook until potatoes are soft-
then add the following:
2-3 6.5 oz cans of clams with clam juice I did two for my kids but would do three if it was just for Danny and I
cream (half and half for a lighter version) to taste.  I really just pour it in until I like the color, consistency and taste.
2 T. cider vinegar
extra salt and pepper to taste

Cook until warm and then serve with flat leaf parsley (not the Italian curly I have pictured) and lemon wedges.  Have black pepper, red pepper flakes & Tabasco sauce on the table for those who want a kick to their soup.  Have plenty of sourdough bread on hand for dipping...bread bowls get soggy...but some people love them.

you say it's yo' birthday

left: Nana, Great-grandma & Uncle Mike (dying to know who you are sticking your tongue at Uncle Mike)  right: Dede, "brother" Mike & me

There are two special birthdays today!

"Mom."  She became my mother on the day I married her son.  The day before we were married we were talking and she invited me to call her "mom."  It has been an honor to be one of "her kids."  One of my favorite memories of her just happened a few years ago.  She told Danny that she would take the girls...and that Danny and I should spend the day out and together.  We had a wonderful day.  When we pulled up to the house Nana and the girls were coming up the hill.  Nana was pulling the wagon and the girls were riding.  I live on a steep hill---and I don't think I could pull them up that incline!  As they got closer we realized that all of them were in pjs...even Nana.  They had been given baths but begged her for one more trip to the park.  She of course told them "yes," she always does.  We love you Nana.

My brother, Mike.  Dede and I were so excited to have a brother!!!!  My favorite Mike memory was when we lived in Boise, ID near the canal.  Mike was sent to find me.  I rode my bike to a friend's house who lived on the other side of the canal.  As Mike started walking that direction he saw my bike close to the water and I was nowhere to be seen.  He assumed what most 6 year olds would...I drowned.  He gathered some flowers from around the waters edge and threw them in as his final gesture.  (I don't remember why I left my bike there...when I went to Kathy's house...but I am glad I did.)  No one makes me laugh harder than Mike does.  Now he shares his birthday week with his dear wife Annie!  I love that your birthdays are just a day apart!  Love you both.

Happy birthday to two special people...born on the same day...a few years apart :)

happy 80th birthday

It isn't everyday that a person turns 80 years old!

Annie asked me at the beginning of the summer what I thought we should do for dad's special day.

We thought about a large party---but he likes to be at home.

Annie said, "What about his history?  We could have it printed."

It was the perfect idea!

Everyone was on board.

We printed his life-history that my dad had created in a digital/web form.

To mark the occasion---the out of towners (Annie + Mike and family) decided to fly in and surprise him.  We planned a regular Sunday dinner.  All of his kids and their families gathered at the corner of the street and drove up together.  Dede and I walked in with our families (as expected).  Right behind us was cute Braden, Mike's son.  He walked in casually and said, "Hi Papa!"  My dad nearly jumped out of his chair.  The remainder of the "surprise" guests walked in...and his evening was already made!

One of my favorite quotes from the book regarding his childhood:

"Mama was able to get a job at the local sewing room and I think she was paid about 20 to  30 dollars a month.  She had to work long hours and she was always tired and her fingers were sore.  Mildred worked at a new business model called a 'drive-in' restaurant and the money she brought home helped out some.  Harry worked at a bakery at night and made a little money.  Joyce watched the younger kids and did some babysitting.  I stayed busy being incorrigible."

On the back of the book we printed our own "book reviews" of his history.

"A life filled with fun, adventures, loving, caring and sharing.  There's not much he hasn't experienced and it's been my great joy to be a part of 'his wonderful life'...then, now and forever.  I'm so thankful he has written this memoir for our posterity to enjoy all the years to come."

Connie

"Tom Sawyer meets John Wayne but neither hold a candle to the tales of Bobby Gene.  This memoir explains why he knew to be strict as a parent and why his kids know that they are lucky to have him as a dad."

Dede

"This is one of my greatest treasures.  I am so grateful to have in print, the stories I have loved to listen to my whole life.  It's beautifully written from a loving father."

Carin

"Pretty cool reading a life story that culminates with me, his pride and joy.  I consider his life a good start."

Mike (his legacy, buddy & pal, Mikey)

"This is a brilliant story that also serves as a guidebook that life should be lived with adventure, wit, tenacity, optimism, charity, spirited passion and love.  I will read it often and treasure him always."

Annie

Top (left to right): Danny, Carin, Annie, Dad, Cameron, Bill, Connie, Dede, Mike, Reagan, Annie Lee

Bottom (left to right): Chase, Sophie, Ellie, Wesley, Kate, Brade, Grace, Sara

Happy birthday Dad!  

We "LOVE you BIG much!"

a snapshot

a snapshot of the first moment you met our sweet Kate...

and the last picture we took of you.

i can't believe it has been seven years.

we miss you.

my granny

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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Aunt Vivian, me, Granny, Dede and our mom</span></div>
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She was born on August 5th, 1896 in Louisville, Mississippi.</div>
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She would have been 115.</div>
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I always think of her when her birthday comes around.</div>
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We LOVED visiting her when we were kids---</div>
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and felt spoiled by the candies and cookies she shared with us...</div>
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even when my dad protested.</div>
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<br /></div>
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I love what my dad wrote of her in his life history-</div>
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<br /></div>
<div style="color: #444444; text-align: center;">
<i>"<span style="font-size: small;">When she died she left very few
possessions because she never wanted much.
The only ambition she ever had was for the well being of her children
and
their families. She spent her life doing back-breaking work struggling
to
keep her family intact. When someone understands all the obstacles that
 she
faced during her life it is clear that her battle was an impossible
one.&nbsp; One thing we can be sure of is that she never gave up and would face
any
challenge. She would not back down from anyone or anything in defense
of her
children or her beliefs. There are so many things that I could praise
her
for but it would consume volumes."</span></i></div>
<br />

16 years

16 years...

married to my best friend.

We sat at the counter at one of our favorite (maybe just mine...but he loves it because I do) restaurants.

I ordered the Market Street salad + asparagus...he ordered the early bird special (gulf shrimp).

We talked.

It is comfortable--but so dear at the same time.

We think so much alike on the things that are most important to us...

yet so different on a few non-essentials---

which keeps life interesting...

and keeps me learning...

and growing...

and I love him more for it.

We finished the date with an impromptu tour through the city of our old "firsts"

(click to enlarge)

the house I lived in when we met--

the apartment he lived in when we met--

the apartment I lived in when we were dating--

the house he lived in when we were dating--

our first apartment married...

and then the place where we were married.

We talked about our favorite memories together...

and some memories we want to make in the future.

I felt loved, happy, and grateful.

family reunion

We gathered for her...

from OH, NY, CO, IA, AZ, TX & UT

June 24th-27th

She is our Aunt Dot (great-aunt for me)

It was a celebration of her 90th birthday!

She flew in from Ohio...after golfing nine holes.

I want to be just like her in so many ways.

She mentioned during one of our conversations during the reunion--

that we are all a bit more agile and fit than her regular companions.

I asked her the secret of her youth, agility and longevity...

Her secret:  no stress.

She was a child's psychologist for a school district.

She has spent her life doing the things she enjoys (including her work).

She has always been able to provide for herself.

She doesn't let little things bother her.

She spends a portion of every day helping others.

She is very witty.

She is a beautiful letter writer.

...and she had no kids of her own = no stress :)

She has most anything she needs or wants

so I was happy that we could compile a book of pictures and memories to surprise her!

She loved it.

We love you Aunt Dot.

Her only request:  keep gathering.

I know we will.

my favorite memory

We were playing "Make Me Laugh."  We would divide the room into two groups.  Each group would do about anything to crack the stone faces of their opponents, while they sat together on the couch.  My group was my aunt, her boyfriend (now uncle), my little sister Annie, and me.  We were up against my mom, dad, sister Dede and my brother Mike (one of the funniest people I know).  We were definitely the underdogs in this group.   

We tried to put our funniest feet forward...but there was nothing.  They were a hard crew to crack.  My small team huddled in my bedroom (I was a senior in high school).  I don't know whose idea it was...but we switched outfits.  Annie traded with my aunt (how did she get my little sister's, who at the time would have been 11 at best, shorts and t-shirt on!?)  I wore my uncles clothes (khaki slacks and a blue polo) and he put my jersey floral dress with sweater on.  We walked in one by one....Annie first...and then we all walked in...they were fine until my uncle entered---wearing a teenagers dress...and
WE WON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

And he won us all over that day...we loved him, and we will miss him.

the greatest neighbor

As we pulled up Grandma's driveway we saw the bike parked by the door.  "Shane's here!!!"  Shane is often visiting Grandma.  You will find him taking Blossom out (the dog), vacuuming, emptying the trash, collecting the mail, fixing Grandma breakfast and yesterday I saw him replace the water on her oxygen machine.  Shane lives next door to Grandma---he is undoubtedly the greatest neighbor I have ever known.

I met Shane when Danny and I were dating.  As a young child he had a very high fever which caused brain damage.  He is one of the most generous hard working people around.  He works at a local grocery store.  He is very careful with his money.  At our reception he brought a gift.  He gift-wrapped a roll of paper towels with a note that it was from him.  That is one of the most memorable gifts I remember receiving and I remember it fondly. 

If Shane isn't working or at Grandma's house you will often find him constructing projects with the neighborhood kids.  Yesterday he followed us to Danny's mom's house-- actually we followed him.  He and my girls beat us over there and proudly exclaimed "We're fast!"  They went straight to the garage and found wood, rope, nails and hammers.  They had big plans of building a tree house.  They constructed, hammered, planned and talked.  No tree house was built...but a lot of fun memories.

we treasure her

Last weekend we had a family party after Robert and Whitney's open house.   Michel was our official d.j.  Grandma was standing off to the side, leaning on her cane.  "Shoop" by Salt and Peppa came on and Grandma was dancing!  She was so cute...I could hardly stand it.  Just before that she was on the ice skating rink, in her wheel chair with her great granddaughters behind her---giving her a ride.  She was grinning from ear to ear!  I will never forget it.  A few other things about her I love~

she loves....
flowers
dolls
making doll clothes
going to parties
collecting beautiful things
going anywhere...she's always ready
Mimi's Cafe
antiques
Blossom (her dog)
her kids (grand kids)
sleepovers with Quincy (a great-granddaughter)
giving gifts
shopping at Gardner Village

I think of her when I see:
baskets of gold (flower)
black-eyed susans (the first flower she gave me from her garden to plant in mine)
fruit trees
any doll
Shirley Temple movies
onions growing in a vegetable garden
quilts
books on flowers, art or church history
a movie in the theater
ribbon & lace
vintage doll clothes

Love you Grandma!!!!!!! Want to go to a movie tonight!!!!????

p.s.  I asked Sophie what grandma loves the most...her immediate response, "Us!" 

images taken August 2008