Wednesday, October 28, 2015

not looking for applause


"If your intentions are to impress people or to get the big applause at the end then you are taking, not giving." -Teitur 
(found here)

To remember to share myself with the intent to give, letting go of what I will receive...that is true magic.  I have been a guitar student off and on (much more off that on unfortunately) for almost 20 years.  When I watched this TedTalk yesterday, my mind went, although this is true for almost any aspect of learning and interest, straight to guitar performances.  I only performed for my family, teachers and recitals.  I immediately felt a difference when other people were in the room (especially teachers and recitals).  My fingers fumbled, my voice weakened and quivered.  That was a large reason that I gave up learning with a teacher.  How limiting to allow a misguided motive change the direction of an opportunity to grow. 

Yesterday in Ellie's guitar lesson I saw the same struggle in her, although to a lesser degree.  I decided that I would make a better effort to play with her as she practices.  We had our first session yesterday. I held her back in a few ways, but in more important ways, we kept each other with a focus of sharing and giving.  Our minds didn't go near any intention to impress.  There was joy in learning for me, and truly if I can focus on a motive to give in all aspects of my life- the work in practice will be so much sweeter.




Friday, October 9, 2015

she still asks me to do her hair



She still asks me to do her hair in the morning and frequently seeks my advice on what she should wear.  She grabs my hand when we walk and tells me a play by play everyday of her time at school.  She leaves a bit of chaos in any room she enters.  Something tells me when she is grown that I will miss that chaos as much as that daily play by play.

Monday, September 21, 2015

plant a tree


“The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now.” – Chinese Proverb

When we were at Sundance for Labor Day, Papa pointed out several trees that were growing on the property in difficult places.  He grabbed pots so that we could replant them at home.  Danny planted them tonight and gave us a Family Home Evening lesson deciding who we want to be and what we want to do...and starting NOW.  

Sunday, September 13, 2015

Sunday



Ellie was asked to give a talk in church and she wasn't excited.  Not even a little bit excited.  Her topic was THE SACRAMENT.  They have had workshops in our congregation to improve talks and presentations.  One aspect in public speaking that has been emphasized is sharing relatable personal experiences.  That seemed a bit tough given her topic but she (really "we") pulled it together.  


When I was 9 years old my Grandma Davis passed away.  She loved movies, dolls, going out to eat and giving gifts.  Christmas was her favorite time of year.  She died a week before Christmas.  I learned some lessons at this time that are special to me.  

First; Life on earth is fragile and will not last forever

Second; Celebrating & reflecting on her life brings comfort to mine

Third; Feeling gratitude for all that she has done for me helps me to be a better person

If those things are true, and they are, for my Great Grandma, they are surely true for my Savior and the Savior of the world.  

The Sacrament, like my grandma’s funeral, is a time of reflecting, remembering and recommitting.  At my Great Grandmas funeral, it was a reverent peaceful environment. I played guitar and sang with my sisters and cousins.  I spent our time there thinking of her and her life.  If we approach the sacrament in this same way, we will benefit from its blessings.

Elder Holland taught “…every ordinance of the gospel focuses in one way or another on the atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ, and surely that is why this particular ordinance with all its symbolism and imagery comes to us more readily and more repeatedly than any other in our life. It comes in what has been called “the most sacred, the most holy, of all the meetings of the Church.  Perhaps we do not always attach that kind of meaning to our weekly sacramental service.”
  

Then he asked:  How “sacred” and how “holy” [is our worship?]”  

I know that I can make the sacrament more sacred and holy in my life.  I can take this ordinance more seriously, spend time reflecting & repenting.  I am promising to remember Him.  I can do better.

Elder Holland speaking of the night of the Last Supper and the Garden of Gethsemane shared this,

“One request Christ made of his disciples on that night of deep anguish and grief was that they stand by him, stay with him in his hour of sorrow and pain. “Could ye not watch with me one hour?” he asked longingly (Matt. 26:40). I think he asks that again of us, every Sabbath day when the emblems of his life are broken and blessed and passed.
'How great the wisdom and the love
That filled the courts on high
And sent the Savior from above
To suffer, bleed, and die!
Oh, it is wonderful, wonderful to me!'”


After church I congratulated her on talking clearly, looking up from her notes and speaking confidently.  "Mom, I was shaking so much I spilled the sacrament water all over me.  I felt so sick. I didn't stop shaking until it was over!"  Even though we wrote the talk together, she made it hers.  She is surely glad it is over.  Hopefully each time it will get easier and easier.

Saturday, September 5, 2015

clean up and a hike




The totem pole at Sundance had to be removed due to rotting.  We came up on a Saturday to help Papa clean up the aftermath...and take a little hike.










Thursday, August 20, 2015

sleeping beauty


It is 10:37 am and this sleeping beauty is still asleep.
It is going to get a bit ugly around here in a few days at 6:30 am.